Monday, October 22, 2012

How Much is Too Much?

I love journals. Pretty, fun, funky, pristine books, just waiting to be filled with my (admittedly atrocious) handwriting. My most intimate thoughts. I inevitably write for a few days, then stop, then write in fits for a few days here and there, and then the journal ends up in a drawer or box somewhere in my house. Rinse and repeat.

This blog began as a new kind of journal for me. I thought I might write more if I could type instead of writing. I thought it might encourage me to say the things I wanted to say, if I could publish them (relatively) anonymously. Then the blog evolved, and it's no longer anonymous. Not that I have any great following; in fact, I'm only sure of one person who reads regularly. But that's not the point.

There are things I'd like to write about, things that are dark and painful. I'd like to release some of that ugliness from my heart and mind, even if that means putting it back out into the universe. But, even for a ridiculously open person like me, it's too personal to write on an open blog. It might be too personal to write on a blog at all. I haven't decided yet.

I'm thinking about taking this blog private. In some ways, I like the idea. I can write what I want, and control who has access to it. But part of the reason I want to write about some of the ugly things I've experienced is the hope that I can help someone. If the blog is private, no random person will ever be able to read it. So, then, what's the point? And, if I'm writing it just for me, why allow anyone to read it? Why not just keep a hand-written journal and release these experiences there?

Sigh...what do you think? How much is too much for a public blog?

4 comments:

RoseAnn said...

Only you can make the determination of how much is too much.

I went private with my blog for different reasons - I needed to vent about specific family situations and I wasn't comfortable doing that with some family members reading.

My biggest dilemma lately is that I want feedback but then I find that I'm not prepared for blatant honesty. I don't like closing posts to comments because what if someone had something really insightful or uplifting to say? But some of the comments I get feel...superficial...like someone (yes, it is usually a specific someone) doesn't really *get* me and they're just saying "There, there".

Kim said...

I have my blog on livejournal. I keep all of my posts to strict "friends only." Then, I have also made filters in the past so only certain people could see certain posts. I feel safter on LJ, compared to blogger, because I don't have to worry about ~*~real people~*~ stumbling on my blog. And, if I just want to write to vent, I can. Or if I want people to read it, I can allow them to read it. I have made some awesome friends through the communities on LJ, as well.

On LJ, I feel as though it's *my* blog. I can write what I want, how I want, when I want, and not worry about the repricusions. I choose who can read my posts and who can't read my posts, and so far, it's worked out great for me.

How much is too much for a public blog? Anything that you wouldn't want your mother/brother/sister/MIL/FIL stumbling upon and commenting on in the future. Those are all concerns you have to take into mind with a public journal. With a journal that's locked down, where you can still have friends read it if you so desire, is a lot more safe in that sense. (In my opinion at least!)

(And yes - I read your blog, too! At some point you mentioned it in the forums, and I found you.)

Anonymous said...

But, where will lurkers lurk if you don't allow us to lurk anymore?

Carol said...

I had no idea that I *HAD* lurkers! Don't worry; I've decided to keep this blog going as-is for now. Should I decide to take it private, I'll warn my readers in time to email me if they want to be included in the distribution.