Wednesday, July 20, 2011

Facebook Friends

I will admit that I resisted Facebook for a long, long time. I didn’t want to keep up with two profiles, and since I already had a Myspace page, I couldn’t be bothered to set up a profile on Facebook. But more and more of my friends *only* had Facebook, so I set up a profile.

I never looked back; Facebook was designed for me. I’m not the kind of person who has one circle of friends. Instead, I have a group from this job or that job, and I have a group from school, and a group from the time I lived in College Station, and certain members of J.’s family. It is physically impossible to keep up with everyone. Facebook allows me to participate in the lives of the people I care about, even though we all have crazy schedules and don’t see each other very often. (In fact, even though I’ve been back in Dallas for 15 months, and the majority of my friends live within a 25 mile radius, I’ve only seen about 15% of them in person. Yes, it’s very, very sad.)

Because of the way I use Facebook, and because I cannot tolerate anything extraneous, I can't wrap my mind around the desire to have 736 friends. I have around 60 friends, and I’m always editing the list. I deny way more friend requests than I accept. I’ve also been known to accept a friend request and then delete the person the very next day (hey, even I don’t like confrontation all the time!). Here are some things to keep in mind if you're thinking of sending me a friend request:

If I don’t know you in person, don’t bother. If we went to school together, but did not speak once after graduation, and you’re adding me now only because we have mutual friends, don’t bother. Or if were friends in school, but have *absolutely nothing* in common now, don’t bother. If we work together in any capacity at the present time, don’t bother. There are occasional exceptions to these rules, but I’m pretty ruthless when it comes to applying them. And if I deny your friend request, and you keep sending it, you will receive a harsh, but nicely worded, private message from me.

(And now a question for my readers: is there a nice way to tell a friend who plays seven different games on Facebook that they should block the status updates because their friends can’t click “block posts from…” quickly enough? Or am I the only one who gets a twitch when their news feed is full of Farmville updates?)

1 comment:

RoseAnn said...

Re: the games on Facebook, I was thrilled when I discovered "block updates from Farmville, etc" because I could still see the regular updates but not their game stuff. Some people play way too many games (says she who will fritter away the afternoon on mental floss or Sporcle LOL).

Really annoying are the ones who seem to have figured out my above trick and now post updates about their games in regular status updates. Don't make me block you entirely!

I even have a couple of people's status updates blocked (sad that they're both family?) so that I can go in and read them when I'm in the right frame of mind and less likely to spout off without thinking.

I haven't done a major culling in a while but I sense one coming after my h.s. reunion. There are people on that list that really don't belong.

For the record, I have ~125 friends and my main source of confusion comes from the little overlaps; I read a post from Beth X. and think it's from Beth Y. and think "weird that I didn't know she was pregnant again". I've even sent a private message to the wrong person but it worked out okay.